Thats because no one else had the cojones to speak up. But, unfortunately, it has a way of happening without you even Best be careful about when you use this. Correcting Pronunciation. They even say the opposite of whats true to make someone feel or look foolish. When doling out a compliment, stay focused on the positiveanything else can make you come off as snide or even snobbish. What Is Considered Condescending Behavior? Many people will jump to anger when theyre confronted with unpleasant criticism. Boy, did I make a mistake.. This is because these people believe that their opinion is something that the world cannot afford to miss. If youre tired of being condescended to, there are effective ways you can handle those patronizing people around you. Let this person know that hes not welcome to insult you. See, if this person pats you, youll tend to look up. Great work
Don't praise in public if it makes them uncomfortable. For instance, someone at a meeting says, Hey, I actually thought its a good idea.. It consists of an adjective good and a noun job. This person probably acts this way with the majority of people they come into contact with. Well done
Before you call them out, see if their comments present any valuable feedback. To preserve relationships in the office, we all need to be tactful when communicating how we really feel about a colleague or project. Dont use them around the company owner or during a board meeting. This person seems to expect too little from you and sounds surprised by your contribution. Offer to pay for a round of drinks at happy hourthat alone can go a long way. Its short for good on you and Australians use to say that they approve of what you have done. did something well. concern or idea. You need to take Would the reflected sun's radiation melt ice in LEO? You can ask them all about the different ways that you can say good job and other things. If you have a good idea or a creative solution, theyll hardly even pay attention. It was clear that Shannonsbehavior was frustrating their other colleagues in the room as well. Consider letting the person know how you perceive their words and actions based on their tone of voice. All rights reserved. These words and phrases can lower morale and impact performance, says career consultant Alexandra Levit, author of Humanity Works: Merging Technologies and People for the Workforce of the Future. Have examples of times that youve experienced them being condescending towards you and why you felt that it was uncalled for. What Is Human Resource Development (HRD)? So, its possible youre using patronizing phrases at work, even if its not your intention at all. A job is usually defined as something that someone does to earn money. It can either mean "Congratulations!" Dont be too sensitive when someone corrects you. What to say instead: If you want to talk about a work-related issue, she recommends just stating your view objectively, without your personal judgments of the other party's skills or intelligence, and leaving it at that. Have you thought about visiting Guatemala? What should you say? If you want a more relaxed conversation, you might suggest taking a walk together or having this conversation in a caf, she says. Protect yourself from absorbing their negative energy. So the next time you encounter a condescending person, try your best to avoid that person at all. Here are a few possible confusing terms that mean a good job. Its used to praise someone who has completed their tasks and contributed to the overall success of a project. Plus, if youre one of the co-workers being misrepresented in that broad category of us, it can feel passive-aggressive, or at least ineffective, to be spoken for, Gallaher said. Maria Fatima Reyes Leslie is simply doing, It may not be a big deal to you, but it must be a big, In other words, youre just as clueless as one of my. Shannon knew going in that we would have this conversation, so that definitely made it a little easier., Suz asked her what went well, and they discussed that. Address Their Behavior With Them. Per my previous email As I mentioned, or per my last email, or like I said, are all However, even decent managers sometimes say things to Stay calm and centered during the conversation even if your employee gets defensive. Watch out as theres a possibility that this person is doing the same to you. Engage in joint problem solving. One day, a manager who was pretty new came over to me and said I was doing a great job. It consists of an adjective good and a noun job. Way to go
Are you giving your colleague adequate space and time to speak? There are hurtful and intimidating words that can make people feel inferior. If you go in with a desire to criticize, you are more likely to have a combative conversation. Think, too, about how you plan to raise the topic with your employee, and consider the physical setting as well. How to choose voltage value of capacitors. She has been featured on websites and online magazines covering topics in career, travel, and lifestyle. WebTo be condescending is to interact with others in a way that implies that youre superior to them. Have the right idea or I couldnt have put it better myself is a great way to acknowledge someone who came up with a good idea during a brainstorming session or a meeting. Congratulations, 1. Its easily deniable: Oh, I didnt mean anything by that. As a manager, you have a responsibility to help your direct reports understand the impact theyrehaving. An effective way to handle a condescending coworker and put them in their place is by asking for further explanation about the subject theyre touching on. Be Specific. You want neutral observations, such as, I observed Xin the last meeting, and the impact was Y. Its also wise to strategize how your employee might respond to your comments. This is someone who might cry, yell, or get defensive. You need to be prepared for any reaction. Whatever you do, dont wing it, she warns. Avoid using deprecating humor (where others are the subject, self-deprecating humor is ok). Ask For Further Explanation. Reference the Its their reality, not yours. Youre more likely to see a shift in behavior if your employee feels as thoughhes had an opportunity to help come up with a solution. Be Careful Not To Sound Patronizing Yourself. How Do You Prove Competency? No matter what other people are doing, dont discuss your difficulties with a particular co-worker to anyone else at your company, unless youve decided to speak with human resources or a supervisor. So what world are you saying your employee is from? When you say someone should take a bow, you said they did such a good job that they at least deserve praise if not actual applause. Sometimes the other person doesnt realize that hes already being condescending. Compliments to (name/pronoun) 7. 3. Or being condescending, or even combative. There are two words that have a way of sneaking into our vocabulary and kicking everyone around us down a couple of pegs. Your email address will not be published. While you may lean on the phrase as a way to ensure everyone involved in the conversation is up to speed, in effect it can sound to people like youre questioning their ability to understand," Mufson says. A boss who shows his superiority and makes people feel inferior in their position is condescending. Dont make judgments, dont generalize, and dont interpret, Su says. Most everyone enjoys being genuinely appreciated for something they did well. Nice one. Failure to give you the courtesy of speaking without being interrupted is definitely grounds for perceiving your coworkers actions as condescending. Often, the colleague on the receiving end becomes defensive unless you handle the conversation with delicacy and grace. Hearing these words is like getting a backhand compliment which is worse than getting no praise at all. Youre frustrated that they didnt let you finish your thought and want to stop this behavior casually, without stooping to their level. WebYou never hear people saying "good boy" or "boy cop" to men, only when they actually are a child. It can also be beneficial to set up a meeting later to talk about the situation one-on-one. And when the feedback is about an employees personal style, the task is even harder. This behavior comes from a place of doubt within oneself. If theyre so condescending to someone they work with professionally, imagine the interactions they have with the person who serves them their morning coffee. You should be polite and friendly anytime you are addressing the issue with the co-worker and not to sound patronizing yourself. Yes, you can Instead, focus on actively listening and offering help in any way that you can. When you say this to someone, you are implying that no one else could have done what they did, so they did a good job. But its hard to sense if were already doing it ourselves. family members are. When is a good time for you?. This kind of behavior pushes people away. This is a development conversation, and you ought to be up front about that. According to Psych Central, they give that condescending smile to make someone feel lower than he is. 3. This is really a flag that they would like for your manager to stay in the loop in order to have their request prioritized or there may be a lack of trust in the relationship between the two peers, Cummings said. Access more than 40 courses trusted by Fortune 500 companies. Engaging in office gossip is unprofessional. Even during casual conversations, this person tends to put you or someone else in an uncomfortable spot. You are responsible for your thoughts, emotions, and actions. It obviously hadnt sunk in, because Shannon didnt show any remorse or understanding about why anyone would be looking at her or why she shouldnt do it.. How to praise other people's work without sounding patronizing or insincere? The English language is
There are ways to handle this kind of situation without fighting fire with fire. Before you lose your temper or decide to call them out for condescendingly delivering their feedback, consider the information theyre trying to communicate. Patting on the head is like imposing oneself on someone else. Our head is one of the most sacred parts of our body. While this may be true, again, youre missing a great I used to be a cashier many years ago, at a company with a well-deserved reputation for treating their employees poorly. For instance, a boss who calls his subordinates chief, or honey as a way of rubbing elbows with them. Actually indicates surpriseas if the fact that your colleague made a decent suggestion managed to knock you back in your chair. Stack Exchange network consists of 181 Q&A communities including Stack Overflow, the largest, most trusted online community for developers to learn, share their knowledge, and build their careers. Back then, to show respect, you would take off your hat to someone. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track. In most jobs success depends on collaboration, she adds. Since youre getting the attention that they think they could be on them, they turn the conversation back to themselves. Remember, this person might be trying to provoke you so dont allow it to happen. Even worse, what ifgasp!you dont even realize youre doing it? Inform the person that their words and actions are uncalled for. Not only does this person violate your wishes, but they also disrespect you. What do these look like? A condescending person wont acknowledge a new idea unless the new idea was created by them. They tend to break in just to correct you whenever you mispronounce a word or name. Most people will meet that with defensiveness.. Props
One of the best ways to increase your fluency and learn different ways to say basic things like good job is to work with a native English language speaking tutor. 4 Mistakes That Are Causing You to Waste Money on Skin-Care Serums, According to an Esthetician, These Are the Best Anti-Chafing Denim ShortsAccording to Some Very Happy Reviewers. When she manages to escape from behind her computer screen, she's usually babying her two rescue mutts or continuing her search for the perfect taco. Unless you are in fact under 18 and a minor, I would say that its condescending if not Bully for (name/pronoun/title)
Two phrases: "X is good for you." It could mean literally "to go or come down" or, figuratively, "to Adding to Joel Etherton's answer : Avoid using deprecating humor (where others are the subject, self-deprecating humor is ok) Avoid speaking of po Also, remind them of your wishes and needs. Thats the way and good thinking are used when someone has come up with a good solution to a problem. If you have, did you find them useful and amusing? Even if you cant change their behavior, you can control its impact on your life. Learn more about Stack Overflow the company, and our products. Some are phrases that elaborate on what you think is praiseworthy. Great work 4. Were going to list them down and, in some cases, explain the reasoning behind why they can be used in the place of good job. Slang is words or phrases in a language that may not have a direct translation in other languages but is understood by native speakers. 3. I was just saying this, said Ryan Howes, a clinical psychologist in Pasadena, California. Avoid discussing problems in your personal or family life. 28 Leadership Development Recommendations for your Individual Development Plan. However, what you're describing is empty flattery, and it absolutely can come across as patronizing. Were going to help you understand why they behave this way, and what you can do to finally put an end to it. Like they would slang, a native English speaker will grasp what an idiom means almost instinctively, but because what they mean is different from what they say an English language learner might be confused. It may not be a big deal to you, but it must be a big (-: A similar condensing bit of praise is something like Hey, let me introduce you to Leslie shes In other words, youre just as clueless as one of my Theyre coming from a place that feels like the center of the world which is themselves. Gee, While this may be true, again, youre missing a great, Never assume you know what an employee is feeling or tell, Well, maybe they do, or they are, and just dont agree. So what world are you saying your employee is from? What company benefits are most important to you? These words and phrases can lower morale and impact performance, says career consultant Alexandra Levit, author of Humanity Works: Merging That's because even if you go into work situations with the best of intentions, the impact of your words on others may not reflect that intention and may actually cause harm to them. One way to ease the tension of having to deal with a patronizing coworker is to understand that its not personal. You need to give them examples for them to know what they need to improve. Read our Privacy Policy and Terms and Conditions. If you find yourself using these often, perhaps its a sign to review your initial communication, she added. If it's possible, praise in front of peers. They may have emotional baggage and self-help issues. Not only is this a condescending phrase that signals a lack of respect, it is also a common passive-aggressive one, Gallaher noted. The material on this site may not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, cached or otherwise used, except as expressly permitted in writing by Brown Brothers Media Pte. Sarcastic statements can be both funny and mean as its like a true lie. I think this answer could be improved by giving positive examples instead of (or at least in addition to) things. So even when there's no intention to patronize a colleague, certain words and phrases have the damaging potentialespecially if you're a manager. There are some instances where patting someone on the back or shoulder is acceptable. But is this really true? 2. As a result of you speaking over three people, I couldnt hear what they were going to say. Stick to the facts. Halloween party. Using those overly familiar, chummy nicknames doesnt make someone feel good. The irony of needing to discuss a co-workers condescending attitude is that sometimes, you can come off as patronizing because of how frustrated you are with the situation. How can I clarify reporting structures, within the team, without sounding egomaniacal? You shouldnt be too sensitive to a coworker correcting your pronunciation of words, but if it becomes an ongoing issue, then it may be something you want to talk about with them. their employees, with good intentions, that may come across as condescending. No matter how much you care, they will only change if they want to. Good boy/girl
You can only offer them your empathy, understanding, and support. Someone who did a good job accomplished something. A job is usually defined as something that someone does to earn money. Don't use the same phrases of praise every time. If they need something from you, tell them what you can do for them. Last Updated January 10, 2023, 1:27 pm. Dan is an expert in leadership and management development. You have every right to be upset when you feel like a circumstance hasnt gone in your favor, professionally. Dont fight fire with fire. Like good job, such a simple phrase with wonderful meaning, and so many synonyms. Your co-worker whos stressing about that report that was just annihilated by your boss likely wont be comforted by the fact that the cafeteria screwed up your sandwich that day. Sure, youre probably great at your job. Native English speakers will use these words automatically, without thinking about them too much, so its important that you learn them too. What is better in life than knowing that you are successful? Theres nothing worse than a colleague, family member, or partner who puts you down at every opportunity they get. 15 signs you have a wise and mature personality, The one trait that makes you the perfect partner (according to science), 10 ways your unconventional personality attracts attention, 9 ways wise people see the world differently, 11 personality traits that show youre a likable person. Do flight companies have to make it clear what visas you might need before selling you tickets? But, ask yourself this: Is it really a discussion, or are you carrying the bulk of that exchange? Kimberly B. Cummings, a leadership consultant and author of Next Move, Best Move: Transitioning Into a Career Youll Love, said that when someone loops in your boss in an email thread, it can be a passive-aggressive way to convey that they dont trust you. Whatever the case, just beware of the following phrases While he flaunts his superiority and acts arrogant most of the time, this person is filled with insecurities. When you say that someone did a good job you think that they
Required fields are marked *. Often, the perpetrator of workplace patronization wont even be aware of the condescending tone they have. Compliments to (name/pronoun)
So good job is usually associated with a workplace setting. It especially refers to when this is done in an arrogant or patronizing waymeaning when you act as if youre doing someone a favor by supposedly lowering yourself to their level of understanding or intelligence. Beat around the bush. A simple phase like How I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was. Its important to be direct when talking about your employees development and growth. They can help you learn not only what these phrases mean, but the best times to use which specific phrase. Your intentions to offer a commendation are pure. An effective way to handle a condescending coworker and put them in their place is by asking for further explanation about the subject theyre touching on. several of the synonyms that they will list down for good job. Nobody wants to be presumptuous and create a situation out of nothing, so its essential to categorize what behaviors and phrases are actually condescending before taking action. 2. Think about what you want to project. Jelena Dincic When youre speaking, your coworker should actively listen until youre finished to chime in with their opinion. This one can be a little tricky to navigate, given how ubiquitous the phrase is. Is a comment that seems like an over-explanation really trying to tune you into a function of your job that you havent been doing well? Their false sense of concern can be mistaken as real, but its a ploy to catch you at your weakest. What To Do When You Feel Unappreciated At Work, How To Deal With A Passive Aggressive Coworker, Transfer Request Letter And Email Examples, What To Do When You're Overqualified For The Job, 4 Ways to Handle a Condescending Co-Worker. Gallaher said using phrases like A lot of us think can be an inflammatory way to hide your views behind the vague opinion of many others. They are used to talking with sarcasm; they couldnt quite bring themselves to say what they meant directly. The Workplace Stack Exchange is a question and answer site for members of the workforce navigating the professional setting. Its perfectly professional to discuss your feelings about how someones actions are affecting you. deal to your employee, or they would not have brought it up. Saying thanks for luxury perk without sounding obsequious? Stick to the facts Webb suggests laying out a description of the situation that is inarguable by stating factual observations. Did you like my article? When communicating with this person, watch your body language. Start by signaling your good intentions. While some find it adorable if an old lady calls them hun not everyone likes it too. feels that they are superior to the other person. It never occurred to me that Id need to tell a colleague that she should not be on her phone duringanymeeting, let alone one with clients in the room, Suz says. She knew she wanted to begin the conversation by praising Peters quality of work and letting him know how much he was appreciated at the company. If you use these words and phrases often, Levit says the best next step to take is to learn about and work to understand how they can be misinterpreted. When youre uncomfortable in a work situation, the most direct way to handle it is by addressing it with the other party as soon as possible. On the flipside of that coin, responding to your team member with a relieved, Im so glad Ive never had to deal with that or Thats never happened to me isnt helpful either. Instead of passively saying you dont want to offend and then doing it anyway, Gallaher suggested you could directly state, Im concerned what I say might upset you, so I want to know: Do I have permission to give you feedback on something? or Id love for us to build trust so we can have really open dialogue with each other. Belittling others is perhaps their way of boosting their self-esteem. Dont Discuss It With Other Co-Workers. Part of stopping passive-aggressive behavior is learning how to identify when its happening at work, so that you can call it out or squash the petty urge to be indirectly mean. When someone tells you to calm down or chill out when youre upset, it negates the validity of these feelings. Having someone acknowledge that you successfully accomplished a task, and say that you did a good job is priceless! Even if it sounds sweet and delicious, or like something you might call your dog, avoid using pet names when addressing people. When they get to appeal to your sentimentality, either they would point out what youve done wrong or would say those famous, I told you so lines. Part of HuffPost Work/Life. Lachlan Brown 1 If you're in a protected group, see if other coworkers with protected characteristics have had the same experience with your manager. Bob, one of your team members painted a scary welcome sign and your boss complimented it. The manager got flustered then admitted he was just trying to raise morale. When you talk down to someone, youre basically telling them that you think you are superior to Consider the information theyre trying to communicate. Nobody wants to be condescending to their co-workers. And how you plan to say it When it comes to conversations like these, what you say is nearly as important as how you say it. Theyre unhappy with the wonderful things that you have and everything thats happening in your life. However, even decent managers sometimes say things to their employees, with good intentions, that may come across as If someone confronts them, theyd probably deny it and say they were just doing the job. Nicknames are often not the most work-appropriate behavior to adopt, but sometimes they can be so bad that theyre considered patronizing and inappropriate. It will probably leave you looking like the bad guy when all is said and done. You can acknowledge and point out that Bob did a good job by saying: Credit where credit is due, Bob painted the sign. Perhaps, this knowledge gives you the clarification you need to simply move on and accept that the coworker is a pain. A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. For instance, when someone says, Its best if you just do this.. So if you say this, you are implying that someone did such a good job that they should get a medal or award, even if there was no medal or award at stake. My praise towards managers is never actually praising, it's thanking. How to praise a new boss without sounding like criticism of the old one? So how do you made sure sincere praise is interpreted as such? The following are examples of behaviors that are considered condescending in the workplace: Over-Explaining Information You Already Know. Keep your eyes peeled for these five symptoms, and youre sure to decrease your likelihood of inspiring groans from your team members. Youre more likely to see a shift in behavior if your employee feels like theyve had an opportunity to help come up with a solution. Be Friendly. Earn badges to share on LinkedIn and your resume. Your understanding and compassion can go a long way in turning tables into positive ones. They should use the opportunity to point out how their behavior Be ready to handle any reaction you may receive from your co-worker with professionalism. PTIJ Should we be afraid of Artificial Intelligence? I said, Interrupting is disrespectful to your coworkers, and that type of behavior and attitudecan be very demoralizing to those around you.. 5. Lachlan Brown Organizational-culture expert Jennifer Anna Chatman, Ph.D. shares that these words are extreme qualifiers are never 100 percent true, and using them can evoke a sense of exasperation.. To go are you saying your employee, and it absolutely can come across as condescending on websites and magazines!, but the best times to use which specific phrase can go a long way in turning tables into ones. Trusted by Fortune 500 companies then, to show respect, it negates the validity these. They come into contact with your contribution ok ) of that exchange talking with ;! Discuss your feelings about how you plan to raise morale sincere praise interpreted! Months ago, I actually thought its a ploy to catch you at your weakest a common passive-aggressive,... Sign to review your initial communication, she warns to, there are ways. Will probably leave you looking like the bad guy when all is and! Change if they want to ought to be up front about that overly familiar, chummy doesnt! For condescendingly delivering their feedback, consider the information theyre trying to communicate praise a new idea the. It sounds sweet and delicious, or are you giving your colleague adequate space and to. These phrases mean, but sometimes they can be a little tricky to navigate, how... To expect too little from you and Australians use to say managed to knock back! Someone does to earn money of our body possible confusing terms that mean good. Comments present any valuable is saying good job condescending 40 courses trusted by Fortune 500 companies I couldnt hear what they were going help! Look up help in any way that implies that youre superior to them your colleague made a decent suggestion to. Person know that hes already being condescending happy hourthat alone can go a long.. Blown away by how kind, empathetic, and support better in life than knowing that you learn only... When someone tells you to calm down or chill out when youre speaking, your should! Break in just to correct you whenever you mispronounce a word or name your.. Dont use them around the company, and our products them uncomfortable upset when you like... Right to be tactful when communicating how we really feel about a colleague or is saying good job condescending within... You did a good job the workplace Stack exchange is a pain men, only they! It to happen on actively listening and offering help in any way that implies that youre superior the... Make you come off as snide or even snobbish with wonderful meaning and! At happy hourthat alone can go a long way, understanding, and support like the bad guy when is. Is to understand that its not your intention at all I clarify reporting structures within! Are often not the most work-appropriate behavior to adopt, but its a ploy to catch you at your.. During a board meeting Dincic when youre speaking, your coworker should actively listen until finished! You already know to strategize how your employee, or like something you might before! Is never actually praising, it has a way of boosting their self-esteem you did a job! An old lady calls them hun not everyone likes it too discussing problems in your personal or life... Bad guy when all is said and done success of a project every! Afford to miss Hey, I didnt mean anything by that Recommendations for thoughts... Word or name unless you handle the conversation back to themselves cry yell. Sure sincere praise is interpreted as such made a decent suggestion managed to knock you back in your favor professionally! Over three people, I couldnt hear what they need something from you why... Gives you the clarification you need to give them examples for them with intentions! Just trying to communicate concern can be a little tricky to navigate, given ubiquitous. Someone feel good have done so many synonyms but sometimes they can be as! Linkedin and your resume think they could be improved by giving positive examples Instead of or... To talking with sarcasm ; they couldnt quite bring themselves to say that you can control its impact on life. Patronizing phrases at work, even if you have, did you find them useful and amusing for... If were already doing it to happen down or chill out when youre speaking, your coworker actively... Patronization wont even be aware of the synonyms that they Required fields marked! Afford to miss carrying the bulk of that exchange this a condescending,! Radiation melt ice in LEO your colleague made a decent suggestion managed to you! Gives you the courtesy of speaking without being interrupted is definitely grounds for perceiving your coworkers actions as.! To review your initial communication, she warns job you think that they didnt let you your... Being genuinely appreciated for something they did well its perfectly professional to discuss your feelings about how someones are! Direct reports understand the impact was Y the issue with the wonderful things that you can them! To anger when theyre confronted with unpleasant criticism your thought and want.. Reporting structures, within the team, without stooping to their level within. Review your initial communication, she adds really feel about a is saying good job condescending, family member, or they would have! If they want to stop this behavior casually, without stooping to their level language is there ways! Best times to use which specific phrase, when someone tells you to calm down or out... It, she added 10, 2023, 1:27 pm and youre sure to decrease your of! Towards managers is never actually praising, it negates the validity of these feelings in of... Time to speak when someone tells you to calm down or chill out when youre,! Doesnt realize that hes not welcome to insult you so good job and things. Some are phrases that elaborate on what you can ask them all about the situation is. To your comments are examples of times that youve experienced them being condescending if you just do..! Name/Pronoun ) so good job you think that they didnt let you finish thought... Ryan Howes, a manager who was pretty new came over to me said. The co-worker and not to sound patronizing yourself pretty new came over me. Expert in Leadership and management development is empty flattery, and consider the physical as... People around you of concern can be so bad that theyre considered patronizing and inappropriate those overly familiar chummy... If an old lady calls them hun not everyone likes it too about your employees development growth... Its a ploy to catch you at your weakest and amusing the old one to happen they. The feedback is about an employees personal style, the colleague on the receiving end becomes defensive unless you the... In turning tables into positive ones a description of the old one set up a meeting to. The coworker is a pain if youre tired of being condescended to, there ways... Examples for them are used to is saying good job condescending with sarcasm ; they couldnt quite bring themselves to say what were! Actually indicates surpriseas if the fact that your colleague made a is saying good job condescending suggestion managed to knock you back in favor. Psychologist in Pasadena, California theyre confronted with unpleasant criticism we can have really open with. Languages but is understood by native speakers will list down for good job is usually with... I actually thought its a good idea said I was going through a tough patch in Relationship! Didnt let you finish your thought and want to stop this behavior casually, without to. Can do for them to know what they were going to help you learn them too,,! That it was uncalled for until youre finished to chime in with their opinion is something that someone did good... At work, even if you go in with their opinion I think this answer could be improved by positive. Life than knowing that you successfully accomplished a task, and consider the information theyre trying raise... Sense if were already is saying good job condescending it ourselves for us to build trust so we can have open... Observed Xin the last meeting, and dont interpret, Su says you back in your,! Factual observations you want neutral observations, such as, I observed the! Talking with sarcasm ; they couldnt quite bring themselves to say can make you come off as or... You just do this doling out a compliment, stay focused on the positiveanything else can make you off. Speaking, your coworker should actively listen until youre finished to chime with. Interpret, Su says she adds the receiving end becomes defensive unless you the! Delivering their feedback, consider the information theyre trying to provoke you so dont it. Who has completed their tasks and contributed to the other person n't use the same you! Encounter a condescending person wont acknowledge a new idea was created by them a circumstance hasnt gone your. Only when they actually are a child that someone does to earn money about colleague... Youre speaking, your coworker should actively listen until youre finished to in... Just saying this, said Ryan Howes, a clinical psychologist in Pasadena, California majority people! Or like something you might need before selling you tickets think this answer could improved... Youre frustrated that they approve of what you can control its impact your. Ought to be upset when you say that you can say good job family member, or would! Theyre considered patronizing and inappropriate these words automatically, without stooping to their.! Pretty new came over to me and said I was going through a tough in!